I just found out that my stupidity somehow saved my life. But now that i know, i just got a little bit more scary
I know its delusional, but i felt like im just spinning around in my sadness and not getting off it, because somehow in my little broken heart felt that its the only connecting strip that i can reach you in my sub conscience. Im afraid to accept that im already fine and complete through Jesus Christ, because i might stop thinking about you, i might forget you.
The steps of a man are established by the LORD, when he delights in his way though he fall, he shall not be cast headlong, for the LORD upholds his hand. Psalm 37:23-24
I hate who i am without you, but i know you hate yourself more with me.
Found myself sitting at the corner of my bed for an hour, thinking, day dreaming and getting mad.
Found myself taking a shower, just standing, letting the water poured to my skin but not feeling anything only my nails harrowing deep in my arms, my face, my legs, my stomach and my soul
Dont sleep.Dont wake up.