Being a Single Pea

Im a SINGLE PEA in a pod of parenting, in other words a “single mom”, “solo parent”, “single parent”, whatever you want to call it. There are 76% single mother, in united state alone and we all have our good or bad reason why we are in this situation.  But one thing im sure of is that, the kid/s we have are the SINGLE reason why we are living happily despite of the circumstances. Sadly, being a single mom is too common nowadays and every year single mom are getting younger and younger.  Im not gonna write about statistics here or make judgement about such. I think the media/relatives/ other people with narrow minded already cover that. Being a Single Mom, gives you  a DOUBLE role, a TRIPLE meal to cook, a QUADRUPLE headache, a MILLION future to think, a BILLION hope to fill and a ZILLION happiness to experience.

 

Now let me share my journey being a SINGLE PEA in a pod of parenting. Im one of the lucky few, who have a very close and supportive  family that i can lean on financially, emotionally, physically and spiritually. But still raising two beautiful boys make you think your still alone.

Yes like it or not, accept it or deny it you will long for a partner somehow. Especially when your kid ask for their father, when school activities calls for a dad, when summer boot camp required a male figure and when playmates go to the park to play kites with their papa. YUP it will suck big time! So, deep inside there is a big HOLE inside that seems incomplete.

 

I experienced that TWICE! 🙂 BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, i was WRONG! That big HOLE, is a load of crap of insecurities. PEOPLE might say that “your kids will not feel complete as a person when they grow up, because of lack of father image”. THEY may be right, IF you let it be. But as a Single mom, you have to first accept it deep inside you that your past and whats lacking cannot defy who you are and kid. IT should  start FROM YOU!

I was really lost when i got pregnant with my second baby. Even i have my family with me, i just cannot cope on whats happening around me. Im so a shame of myself that i stopped praying, nor go to church anymore and just pity myself day and night.  But GOD, used the opportunity to enter in my life and everything was PEACEFUL and full of blessing.

 

YES, i was and is GOD who saves me from the big HOLE of a mess that i made. Some of you might stop reading this, because you might think it will just lead to Godly revelation kinda blog. WELL IT IS! And im not a shame of it. WHY will i be? when He never sees my shame at the first place.

 

I was crying day and night, and felt that i got no one to turn too and no one who will understand. Till it HIT me, and call for help to JESUS CHRIST. (you know sometimes, that God is the last resort) I prayed so hard, VERY HARD but no one is answering and it seems no one is listening.  I went to church one day and  the pastor preached about this passage:

 

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by PRAYER and PETITION, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the PEACE of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in CHRIST JESUS. ~PHILIPPIANS 4:6-7

The pastor says that GOD do listen through your prayers, but you also have to do your part. THROUGH PETITION, you have to surrender all your worries and confess all your sin and accept JESUS CHRIST as your savior. Savior from your sin, savior from your insecurities, savior from being a failure, savior from being a single parent and many more. Coz JESUS is the ONLY ONE bridge to God the Father and to YOU! (that is why whenever we end in prayer, its always THROUGH CHRIST!). JESUS is the STRING
between the two empty can for God can hear you.. because GOD is HOLY and MAN is NOT.

 

1 Surely the arm f the Lord is not too short to save, nor his ear too dull to hear. 2 But your iniquities have separated you from your God; your sins have hidden this face from you, so that he will not hear. ~ISAIAH 59:1,2

 

Since then, as i understand whats wrong. Ive done my part, and all the blessings come pouring! and i URGE TO KNOW HIM MORE. (discuss that more on the next blog)

I was never alone. And never been SINGLE. i might not have a partner in life, but i have a HUSBAND who will look after my 2 boys and Who will complete their being when they grow up.  I have God with me, my Abba, Father.

5For your Maker is your husband – the Lord Almighty is his name – the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth. 6The Lord will call you back as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit – a wife who married young, only to be rejected,” says your God . 7″For a brief moment i abandoned you, but with deep compassion I will bring you back. 8In a surge of anger I hid my face from you for a moment, but with everlasting kindness i will have compassion on you,” says the Lord your Redeemer. ~ISAIAH 54:5-8

 

 

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